Nanny Care Cadre Guidelines

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Nanny Care Cadre is open to nannies, agencies and parents and welcomes a wide variety of viewpoints. We work hard to create a supportive and engaging online community and ask for your help in maintaining that atmosphere.  Every member is responsible for reading and following the guidelines.

COMMUNITY VIBE My goal is to keep the overall tone of the group positive and respectful. That often means asking people to communicate a little differently than they might be used to. Here’s a list of the group’s guidelines.

ASKING FOR THE ADVICE YOU NEED  Sometimes you want a wide variety of opinions. And you’ll get them here.  Other times you only want ideas and advice that align with an approach you’re taking, a situation you’re in, or a decision you’ve made. Please clearly state that in your post. This helps others know the best way to support you and allows those who can’t offer helpful advice know to skip your post. For example, if you want ideas on the best way to use the “3 day potty training” method, simply say “We’ve decided to potty train with the 3 day method.  Please only offer advice on using that method.” Or if you use a Positive Discipline approach, simply say “Please only Positive Discipline advice.” Remember if you don’t do this in the beginning but realize as comments come in that you want to add it, you can edit your original post or add it to the comment thread.

ADVOCACY  As professionals, it’s our responsibility to advocate for developmentally appropriate practices in childcare and professional standards in industry practices.  Any question or comment that includes advice that will harm a child physically or emotionally (e.g. spanking, intentional shaming) will be deleted.  Any statement by that promotes illegal or substandard pay or treatment will be deleted.   (Questions that ask about taxes or the challenges of legal pay are welcome.)

DEBATE Some topics will inspire impassioned opinions and I encourage you to share those opinions, even if you find yourself in the minority. Debate, grounded in respect and open-mindedness, is a great tool for personal and professional growth. When disagreeing with another member, please do so in a way that does not disrespect, belittle, demean or disparage that member or the person they’re talking about (e.g. their employer, their nanny). Focus your comments on the message, not the messenger (e.g. “I don’t agree that working for a SAHM is horrible” rather than “You’re an idiot who just can’t get along with her employer”). Once you’ve stated your opinion, let it go unless you truly have something NEW to add or can clarify a point. Your goal is to share your ideas, not to change everyone’s way of thinking so they agree with you. We debate a lot in this group. We don’t view this as arguing or conflict, simply the sharing of ideas we feel strongly about. If debate makes you uncomfortable, simply skip those posts.

JOB / NANNY PROBLEMS If you’re having an issue with your family or nanny, this is one of the best places to get great advice or suggestions. I ask that instead of focusing on the negative (I hate my job!) you focus on asking for support and possible solutions (I’m so frustrated and I don’t know how to talk to my employers about leaving the house with the kids). It’s easy for facebook groups to turn into one big gripe session and we work hard to keep that from happening in the cadre.  

SUPPORT: Everyone has a bad day. If you’re having one of those overwhelming days where it’s been one thing after another in your world and you just need to let it out and get some virtual support, please share. If you just want to complain about how horrible a parent was at the mall or dis the cleaning lady for not putting things back in the right place, please resist. I understand those things can be annoying but again, It’s easy for facebook groups to turn into one big gripe session and we work hard to keep that from happening here.

JUDGMENT FREE ZONE People come here for support, advice, and resources. What they don’t want or need are other members telling them how wrong they are, how unprofessional they are, or anything in that judgmental vein. If you can’t share your thoughts in a respectful, non-judgmental way, just skip the post. Also, please don’t post stories or pictures just to show a parent’s bad parenting choices. It serves no purpose and just encourages others to jump on the judgment bandwagon.

NON NANNY RELATED POSTS Non-nanny related posts are welcomed in this group. As a community, we want to get to know other members on a personal level. However not everyone wants to read off non-nanny related posts so please start all those posts with NNR.  Also remember that overall, this is a professional networking group. Don’t share overly personal information and limit the number of NNR posts you share.

PRIVACY AND CONFIDENTIALITY To protect the privacy of nannies and employers, both past and present, please do not use their names when discussing a work situation.

Please do not post screen shots of text messages from your employer / nanny.  That person considered it to be a private conversation  and hasn’t given permission for it to be shared.  You can summarize the conversation and quote any phrasing that is particularly troubling in your post.

PHOTOS: You’re welcome to post pictures of your children or your charges if you have permission to share those pictures on social media sites. Photos showing your charge, your employers or your nanny in a negative light are not allowed. This could include pictures of your charge melting down, of your employer’s disaster of a play room on Monday morning or of your nanny’s messy car. These photos are an invasion of privacy and in general, go against the “treat others as you’d want to be treated” idea.

JOB WANTED / NANNY WANTED POSTS  Any type of recruitment is not allowed in the Cadre.  Please do not post job openings or position wanted notices. No exceptions.

PROMOTION If you’re an active member of the community meaning you’ve participated in discussions on a regular basis over the last couple of months, feel free to share your blog posts, your upcoming training, your nanny getogether announcements or other things you’d like to promote.  I do check ever promotional posts and if you just join and post a promotion, I consider that spam and will delete your post and membership. 

WHO CAN SEE MY POSTS This is a closed group so anyone can see the group and who’s in it but only members can see the posts. If you post in the group, your posts aren’t seen by your facebook friends unless they are also members of the group. Although this group is closed, think carefully before sharing any sensitive information (e.g. things that might get you fired if your employer heard about them). Remember nothing is ever really private on the internet. If you’d like to pose a question anonymously, use that option when posting.  

ACRONYMS Here are the nanny specific short codes you’ll find on the page. MB: mom boss, DB: dad boss, NF: nanny family, NK: nanny kid, SAHM: stay at home mom, WFHM; work from home mom, WFHP: work from home parent

REMOVAL I retain the right to remove any member for any reason. I generally don’t contract members before deleting a comment or thread or removing them from the group. The guidelines are clearly spelled out and it’s every member’s responsibility to read and follow them.’

OTHER NO NOS
1. Don’t talk about drama happening in other facebook groups or discussion forums. It just turns into a gossip fest.
2. Don’t copy and paste any post or comment from Nanny Care Cadre to any external group or site without EXPLICIT permission from the author.
3.  If you’re writing an article or doing research, you must include that in your original post.

If you have questions or concerns, you can email me at info@nannycarehub.com

And visit me at https://www.facebook.com/nannycarehub/

Lora Brawley
Moderator, Nanny Care Cadre
owner, Nanny Care Hub

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